Quotes & Sayings

Welcome to Quotes & Sayings.net. Our site has been put together as a collection of some of the worlds favorite and hilarious quotes and sayings. Many are funny, comforting, inspirational, thought-provoking, motivational, sporty, witty, literary and occasionally rather rude. Our resource is free, fully search-able, and regularly updated to help you can find the appropriate quote for you whether you are putting together a newsletter, speech, greeting card, school or college work, presentation, after dinner speaking, journals, email signatures, a quote of the day, or just would like to have witty sayings for facebook or just some clever things to say on a subject. We hope you find a quote or saying to suit your occasion, or that you just simply enjoy the pleasure of reading other peoples view on life!

The Quotes and Sayings Team

Play the Quotes & Sayings New Game!
The game objective is to try and match the quotes and their respective authors. Players should answer ten questions in the least time possible, good luck!

Witty sayings about life
Clever quotes for Facebook
Funny anniversary sayings
Inspirational quotes and sayings
Hilarious quotes and sayings

Inspirational Quotes of Wisdom, Deep Thoughts of Wise Men

Love Quotes & Sayings

Zen & Wise Quotes & Sayings

If you are looking for some inspirational, funny, beautiful or fun marriage sayings then you have come to the right place. Our team have carefully chosen a wide selection of sayings that can be used on the wedding day itself, perhaps in a speech, or just a word to the bride and groom themselves.

Marriage sayings follow-

All weddings are similar, but every marriage is different.
Marriage saying by John Berger

Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.
Louis K. Anspacher

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time.
Marriage saying by Anne Taylor Fleming

Newlyweds become oldyweds, and oldyweds are the reasons that families work.

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight.
Saying by unknown

A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love.
Marriage saying by Pearl S. Buck

When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.
Saying by G.B. Shaw

Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.
Mark Twain Marriage Saying

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner

A first-rate marriage is like a first-rate hotel: expensive, but worth it. Marriage saying by Mignon McLaughlin

Love is a flower which turns into fruit at marriage.

Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.
Joyce Brothers Marriage saying

The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re right if you love to be with them all of the time.
Saying by Julia Child

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you’re wrong admit it;
Whenever you’re right shut up.
Ogden Nash

Don’t marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can’t live without.
James C. Dobson marriage sayings

If you looking for some inspiration with some love sayings, perhaps for a card or letter that you are planning to write, or maybe for some poetry, then we hope that this section will be of some help. A selection of some well known and some not so well known love sayings follow…

I tell you I love you every day for fear that tomorrow isn’t another.

The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss.

Love puts the fun in together,
The sad in apart,
The hope in tomorrow,
The joy in the heart.

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age.

I see you in every passing face.

Just because someone doesn’t love you
in the way you want them to,
doesn’t mean that they don’t love you
with all they’ve got.

Let love be your greatest aim.

All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt!

The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.

Don’t forget to love yourself.

He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much.

Love knows no reasons,
love knows no lies.
Love defies all reasons,
love has no eyes.
But love is not blind,
love sees but doesn’t mind.

Life is the flower for which love is the honey.

Love is to think about someone else more times in a day than you think about yourself.

Love is sometimes denied, sometimes lost,
sometimes unrecognized, but in the end,
always found with no regrets, forever valued
and kept treasured.

Love is the master key which opens the gates of happiness.

Love: Two minds without a single thought.

From every human being there rises a light that reaches straight to heaven. And when two souls that are destined to be together find each other, their streams of light flow together, and a single brighter light goes forth from their united being.

Love makes life so confusing but without love would you want to live?

Love without return is like a question without an answer.

Sometimes we let affection,
go unspoken,
Sometimes we let our love
go unexpressed,
Sometimes we can’t find words to tell
our feelings,
Especially towards those
we love the best.

The courses of true love never did run smooth.

Funny famous quotes are plentiful in supply thanks to the witty humor of so many well known people, so with out further ado please feel free to dip into the following hand-picked collection of funny famous quotes from around the world.

“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot”
Groucho Marx

“The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech”
George Bernard Shaw funny famous quote

“Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry”
Bill Cosby

“A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair”
Steve Martin quotation

“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time”
Robin Williams funny quotation

“The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
Albert Einstein

“However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results”
Winston Churchill funny quote

“If it’s sent by ship then it’s a cargo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a shipment”
Dave Allen

“The most expensive habit in the world is celluloid, not heroin, and I need a fix every few years”
Steven Spielberg Funny quote

“If only God would give me some clear sign. Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank”
Famous quote by Woody Allen

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn’t stand for that.
Steve Martin famous funny quotation

“Have no fear of perfection — you’ll never reach it”
Salvador Dali quote

“Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet”
Robin Williams Funny quote

“For God’s sake give me the young man who has brains enough to make a fool of himself”
Robert L Stevenson

“I am quite serious when I say that I do not believe there are, on the whole earth besides, so many intensified bores as in these United States. No man can form an adequate idea of the real meaning of the word, without coming here”
Charles Dickens funny famous quote

“The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age”
Lucille Ball quotation

So I went to the Doctor’s yesterday. He said, “What appears to be the problem?” I said, “I keep having this dream, night after night, beautiful girls rushing towards me and I keep pushing them away.” He said, “How can I help?” I said: “break my arms”
Tommy Cooper funny quote

“War does not determine who is right – only who is left”
Bertrand Russell

“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half-shut afterwards”
Benjamin Franklin

“He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt”
Joseph Heller funny quotation

“Cheer up. The worst is yet to come”
Funny famous quotation by Mark Twain

“Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal”
Demetri Martin

Famous Quotes
To follow is a selection of some of the more famous quotes and quotations from around the world over the past few thousand years or so…

“In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman”
Margaret Thatcher

“What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce”
Mark Twain

“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made”
Groucho Marx

“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”
Katharine Hepburn

“If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?”
Linda Ellerbee

“I haven’t failed, I’ve found 10,000 ways that don’t work”
Thomas Edison

“A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul”
George Bernard Shaw

“Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement”
Mark Twain

“I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night”
Marie Corelli

“I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch”
Gilda Radner

“Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid”
Hedy Lamarr

“When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country”
Elaine Boosler

“A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing”
Oscar Wilde

“I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally”
WC Fields

“You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label”
Mark Twain

“If everything seems under control, you’re just not going fast enough”
Mario Andretti

“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he’d learned in seven years”
Mark Twain

“Of course I have played outdoor games. I once played dominoes in an open air cafe in Paris”
Oscar Wilde

“Someone threw a petrol bomb at Alex Higgins once and he drank it!”
Frank Carson

“My reputation grows with every failure”
George Bernard Shaw

“I’m desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets”
Dave Edison

“Wagner’s music is better than it sounds”
Mark Twain

Quotes about life is one of our most popular categories for obvious reasons. The collection of quotes and sayings to follow are a diverse range from people all over the world on how they see life themselves, which makes for a very interesting and compelling read.

“True religion is real living; living with all one’s soul, with all one’s goodness and righteousness”
Albert Einstein

“Sit quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and the grass grows by itself”
Zen saying

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”
John Lennon

“Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that the stuff life is made of”
Benjamin Franklin

“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter”
Martin Luther King

“Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy — because we will always want to have something else or something more”
Brother David Steindl-Rast

“What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn’t have done it. Who was it who said, “Blessed is the man who has found his work”? Whoever it was he had the right idea in his mind. Mark you, he says his work–not somebody else’s work. The work that is really a man’s own work is play and not work at all. Cursed is the man who has found some other man’s work and cannot lose it. When we talk about the great workers of the world we really mean the great players of the world. The fellows who groan and sweat under the weary load of toil that they bear never can hope to do anything great. How can they when their souls are in a ferment of revolt against the employment of their hands and brains? The product of slavery, intellectual or physical, can never be great”
Mark Twain

“Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condition of life in which chance has placed us, but is always the result of a good conscience, good health, occupation, and freedom in all just pursuits”
Thomas Jefferson

“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”
Annie Dillard

“I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the community, and as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can”
George Bernard Shaw

“The truth is always exciting. Speak it, then. Life is dull without it”
Pearl S. Buck

“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile”
Albert Einstein

“If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn’t brood. I’d type a little faster.”
Isaac Asimov

“Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it”
Tom Lehrer

“Our care should not be to have lived long as to have lived enough”
Seneca

“The best things in life are nearest: Breath in your nostrils, light in your eyes, flowers at your feet, duties at your hand, the path of right just before you. Then do not grasp at the stars, but do life’s plain, common work as it comes, certain that daily duties and daily bread are the sweetest things in life”
Robert Louis Stevenson

“Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save”
Will Rogers

Sports Quotes can be great way to help you get in the right frame of mind for training or the big event. The following list of quotes and sayings are just a few from some of the biggest personalities in sport over the years. Many of the quotes can also be great when used to start or end a speech or they just simply make fascinating reading and can help you gain an insight into the people who wrote them.

“My dad has always taught me these words: care and share. That’s why we put on clinics. The only thing I can do is try to give back. If it works, it works”
Tiger Woods

“It’s lack of faith that makes people afraid of meeting challenges, and I believed in myself”
Muhammad Ali

“I’ll let the racket do the talking”
John McEnroe

“The way a team plays as a whole determines its success. You may have the greatest bunch of individual stars in the world, but if they don’t play together, the club wont be worth a dime”
Babe ruth

“Ain’t no chance if you don’t take it”
Guy Clark

“The country is full of good coaches. What it takes to win is a bunch of interested players”
Don Coryell, San Diego Chargers Coach

“I thought lacrosse was what you find in la church”
Robin Williams

“My thoughts before a big race are usually pretty simple. I tell myself: Get out of the blocks, run your race, stay relaxed. If you run your race, you’ll win… channel your energy. Focus”
Carl Lewis

“Show me a guy whos afraid to look bad, and I’ll show you a guy you can beat every time”
Lou Brock

“Playing polo is like trying to play golf during an earthquake”
Sylvester Stallone

“We didn’t lose the game; we just ran out of time”
Vince Lombardi

“I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok”
Shaquille O’Neal

“The game isn’t over till it’s over”
Yogi Berra

“The will to win is important, but the will to prepare is vital”
Joe Paterno

“I was called “Rembrandt” Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas” Bob Hope

“Sport strips away personality, letting the white bone of character shine through. Sport gives players an opportunity to know and test themselves”
Rita Mae Brown

“You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them”
Michael Jordan

“Ask not what your teammates can do for you. Ask what you can do for your teammates”
Magic Johnson

“Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there”
Will Rogers

“I’m a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it”
Thomas Jefferson

“I’ve always made a total effort, even when the odds seemed entirely against me. I never quit trying; I never felt that I didn’t have a chance to win”
Arnold Palmer

Love Quotes & Sayings, perhaps a good way to kick off this section is with a quote from the famous film, Captain Correlli’s Mandolin.

“When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No… don’t blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn’t sound very exciting, does it? But it is!”

“Love is a fruit in season at all times, and within the reach of every hand”
Mother Theresa

“Love is a canvas furnished by Nature and embroidered by imagination”
Voltaire

“What is love? It is the morning and the evening star.”
Sinclair Lewis

“I’d like to run away
From you,
But if you didn’t come
And find me …
I would die”
Shirley Bassey

“At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet”
Plato

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked”
Erich Segal

“Love is a state of mind which has nothing to do with the mind”
Bob Phillips

“Love doesn’t make the world go ’round.
Love is what makes the ride worthwhile”
Franklin P. Jones

“I have found men who didn’t know how to kiss.
I’ve always found time to teach them”
Mae West

“Love is the greatest refreshment in life”
Pablo Picasso

“They do not love that do not show their love. The course of true love never did run smooth. Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love”
William Shakespeare

“Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence”
Henry Louis Mencken

“Love is the emblem of eternity: it confounds all notion of time: effaces all memory of a beginning, all fear of an end”
Germaine De Stael

“…But love is a durable fire
In the mind ever burning;
Never sick, never old, never dead
From itself never turning”
Sir Walter Raleigh

“Love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person. Love is an act of faith, and whoever is of little faith is also of little love”
Erich Fromm

Funny quotes are great to check out just for a laugh at any time, as well as being great when used at the start or end of a speech for any occasion or by putting them into any written works that you may be undertaking.

Funny quotes to follow…

“You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on”
Dean Martin

“Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle”
Bob Hope

“A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it’s the stupid ones that need the advice”
Bill Cosby

“Lisa, Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos”
Homer J Simpson

“Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it’s a pretty good one”
Woody Allen

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”
John Lennon

“There is nothing wrong with making love with the light on. Just make sure the car door is closed”
George Burns

“He’s got a photographic mind. Too bad it never developed”
Leopold Fechtner

“Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy”
Steve Martin

“If Dracula can’t see his reflection in a mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?”
Steven Wright

“Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt”
Mark Twain

“I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers”
Gandhi

“When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity”
Albert Einstein