Quotes & Sayings » Famous Quotes

Funny Famous Quotes

admin — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 11:43:42 +0000

Funny famous quotes are plentiful in supply thanks to the witty humor of so many well known people, so with out further ado please feel free to dip into the following hand-picked collection of funny famous quotes from around the world.

“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot”
Groucho Marx

“The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech”
George Bernard Shaw funny famous quote

“Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry”
Bill Cosby

“A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair”
Steve Martin quotation

“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time”
Robin Williams funny quotation

“The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
Albert Einstein

“However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results”
Winston Churchill funny quote

“If it’s sent by ship then it’s a cargo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a shipment”
Dave Allen

“The most expensive habit in the world is celluloid, not heroin, and I need a fix every few years”
Steven Spielberg Funny quote

“If only God would give me some clear sign. Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank”
Famous quote by Woody Allen

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught me with another woman. I wouldn’t stand for that.
Steve Martin famous funny quotation

“Have no fear of perfection — you’ll never reach it”
Salvador Dali quote

“Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet”
Robin Williams Funny quote

“For God’s sake give me the young man who has brains enough to make a fool of himself”
Robert L Stevenson

“I am quite serious when I say that I do not believe there are, on the whole earth besides, so many intensified bores as in these United States. No man can form an adequate idea of the real meaning of the word, without coming here”
Charles Dickens funny famous quote

“The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age”
Lucille Ball quotation

So I went to the Doctor’s yesterday. He said, “What appears to be the problem?” I said, “I keep having this dream, night after night, beautiful girls rushing towards me and I keep pushing them away.” He said, “How can I help?” I said: “break my arms”
Tommy Cooper funny quote

“War does not determine who is right – only who is left”
Bertrand Russell

“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half-shut afterwards”
Benjamin Franklin

“He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt”
Joseph Heller funny quotation

“Cheer up. The worst is yet to come”
Funny famous quotation by Mark Twain

“Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal”
Demetri Martin

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Famous Quotes

admin — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 11:27:46 +0000

Famous Quotes
To follow is a selection of some of the more famous quotes and quotations from around the world over the past few thousand years or so…

“In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman”
Margaret Thatcher

“What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce”
Mark Twain

“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made”
Groucho Marx

“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”
Katharine Hepburn

“If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?”
Linda Ellerbee

“I haven’t failed, I’ve found 10,000 ways that don’t work”
Thomas Edison

“A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul”
George Bernard Shaw

“Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement”
Mark Twain

“I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night”
Marie Corelli

“I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch”
Gilda Radner

“Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid”
Hedy Lamarr

“When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country”
Elaine Boosler

“A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing”
Oscar Wilde

“I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally”
WC Fields

“You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label”
Mark Twain

“If everything seems under control, you’re just not going fast enough”
Mario Andretti

“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he’d learned in seven years”
Mark Twain

“Of course I have played outdoor games. I once played dominoes in an open air cafe in Paris”
Oscar Wilde

“Someone threw a petrol bomb at Alex Higgins once and he drank it!”
Frank Carson

“My reputation grows with every failure”
George Bernard Shaw

“I’m desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets”
Dave Edison

“Wagner’s music is better than it sounds”
Mark Twain

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Inspirational / Motivational Video with Famous Quotes

admin — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 17:14:56 +0000

Get Motivated @ www.read-ebooks.net motivational motivational sayings motivational quotes motivational quote motivational speakers motivational thoughts motivational speaker motivation motivational poems motivational posters motivational poster motivational art motivational…

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Famous Quotes and sayings 1701-1750 from Wisdom Collection – the book of passion by Sorin Cerin

admin — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 16:12:10 +0000

Famous Quotes and sayings 1701-1750 from Wisdom Collection – the book of passion by Sorin Cerin

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Creative relaxation pics and famous quotes

admin — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 15:14:03 +0000

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DESTINY – FAMOUS QUOTES 2876-2912 from WISDOM COLLECTION by SORIN CERIN

admin — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 14:11:11 +0000

WORDS OF WISDOM QUOTES ABOUT DESTINY.

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quotes of wisdom

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famous love quotes 1851-1900 from Wisdom Collection- the book of passion by Sorin Cerin

admin — Sat, 05 Jun 2010 13:11:12 +0000

famous quotes and sayings 1852 -1900 from Wisdom Collection – the book of passion

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MEANNESS – FAMOUS QUOTES 4451-4462. FROM WISDOM COLLECTION BY SORIN CERIN

admin — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 12:11:38 +0000

Meangful quotes and quotations about meanness.

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HAPPINESS – FAMOUS QUOTES 3385-3410 from Wisdom Collection by Sorin Cerin

admin — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 11:11:23 +0000

What is happiness?Famous quotes, deepest quotes ….about happiness…

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3 Part Famous Quotes/ Paper Towns/ TheJoeFrom1993

admin — Sun, 30 May 2010 10:11:57 +0000

This video is has three parts Famous Quotes The book paper towns and thejoefrom1993′s new account www.youtube.com www.youtube.com there u go

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