Funny Sayings are a great way to get someone to laugh or smile whether you say it face to face, by letter or email. There are a great many funny sayings out in the world today and in this category we have tried to cherry pick the very best ones for you and others to enjoy.

“I either Get what I want or I change my mind”
Anonymous saying

“He’s as baffled as Adam on Mothers Day”
Anon funny saying

“Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons”
Anon saying

“As confused as a hungry baby in a topless bar”
Anon fun saying

“An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault”
Unknown author fun saying

“A legend in his own mind…”
Anon saying

“She’s stroked more wood than a Furniture Polisher”
Anon funny saying

“We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture”
Robin Williams

“Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely”
Funny Anonymous saying

“Golf is a good walk spoiled”
Mark Twain quote

“About as interesting as watching paint dry”
Funny saying by Anon

“Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped. To cease smoking is the easiest thing. I ought to know. I’ve done it a thousand times. Murphy was an optimist. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless”
Unknown author fun quote

“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens”
Abraham Lincoln saying

“She’s seen more ceilings than Michelangelo”
Fun saying by Anon

“My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes”
Unknown author saying

“Ability is what will get you to the top if the boss has no daughter”
Unknown author fun saying

“Sex was the most fun I ever had without laughing”
Woody Allen saying

“My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife, you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher”
Fun saying from unknown author

“As tight as a Camels eye-lids in a Sand-storm”
Anon saying

“Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution yet”
Saying from unknown

“About as welcome as a fart in a telephone box”
Funny saying by Anon

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